Can I be straight with you for a second. Just you and me mono e mono. Welcome to the cone of silence. There is zero chance of me being objective with this review. Yes, I know…that is a very damaging thing to admit. Worse still, there is no way I can deny having said it (because stupid me, I already pushed publish.) But I figured I owed you my honesty, or at the very least, my conscience is a total “B.”
“Why?” you ask, can I not be objective? Well, to lay all the cards on the table…I am a total marshmallow. (That’s code for Veronica Mars fangirl.) Long story short, I have watched every season of the TV show (a minimum of) five times. The movie? Yeah, I’m not going to admit that publicly. (Trust me…you wouldn’t either.) Anyways, the point of this semi-nonsensical rambling? To give you a heads up. I may in fact use words like: awesome-sauce, fantabuloso, and OMFG! in the following review. I’ll TRY to refrain, but I make no promises. You have been warned.
How about we get the most important detail out of the way first. (Because let’s face it, if you’re a VM fan, this is what you REALLY want to know.) There is literally 5 seconds of Logan in this book. (*gasp*) “Thousand Dollar Tan Line” picks up exactly where the movie left off so…for those of yo that watched it, it shouldn’t be too much of a shock to hear that thine beloved bad-boy of hotness (*wipes drool from chin*) is still sporting white and currently sailing the high seas. (Boo!!) Thomas and Graham WERE kind enough to offer up a few sketchy Skype calls from the boat (to wet our lusty whistles) but don’t get too excited, they are nothing to write home about. (“Veronica…I can’t hear you…are you there??” Ugh!)
Logan aside (*tear*) the rest of the Neptune crew is on their game. Flush with a new crime to solve (that *cue dramatic music* happens to involve a powerful drug cartel) Veronica, her ever present wit, and one tiny bikini take to the streets in hopes of finding not 1 but 2 missing girls.
BUT WAIT…THAT’S NOT ALL!! One of the missing girls is her ______ Nope, sorry, not gonna spoil it, but trust me…it’s juicy!
To keep from talking for days, I’ll put it this way. Just like every VM crime to date there are twists (aka: pot heads in a locked bedroom.) Turns. (Veronica attempting to taking one for the team with DICK CASABLANCAS!) And mounds of potentially life threatening situations. (“Let me introduce you to my psycho girlfriend with a taser.”)
It wasn’t all snark and butt kicking though. Noooo, there was also a lot of soul searching. For Veronica, her dad, AND the people surrounding her.
Things are still a little up in the air for Veronica. Her life took a pretty hard left in the movie, and this novel is essentially her attempt to pick up the pieces and arrange them accordingly. As the saying goes: It takes a village! And if nothing else is crystal clear about Ronnie’s life, the fact that she has a village of loved ones ready to jump through hoops for her is.
And…if all that wasn’t enough to convince you to grab a copy, the ending opened up a whole new can of worms. Big, fat, maraca loving worms.
It’s safe to say that if you are a VM fan you’ll love this book. If you are in the mist about Veronica, start from the beginning and work your way up to this. It’s the only safe way to go.
Happy Reading my fellow Kindle-ites and remember: It’s ok to be a lunatic fangirl every once in a dang while. Don’t judge me!!
Weren’t a Veronica Mars fan back in the day? No problem…here is the first 2 minutes of the movie that will lay out her long complicated history for you.