Where’s A Torch When You Need One?

I don’t know about the rest of you, but books and I… we have a love/hate relationship.  Just when I think I’ve finally hit that “plateau” that illusive level where the books stop sucking and I can ride a wave of beautifully penned literature, I get hit with a novel that makes me want to chunk it into a sink hole.

When I first let on that I was reading “One Day” by David Nicholls I got hit with a rash of the most entertaining tweets or emails I’ve ever seen. “One Day… as in the book written by the devil?” “Oh God, save yourself.. read the operator manual to your refrigerator instead.” Now, for any sane human these statements would lead to a mass exodus to the right, but for me, the girl that more often that not disagrees with popular opinion, it was like hanging a 10 pound bag of gummy bears in front of my face and then refusing to let me eat them.  I was GOING to read this freaking book, and I was hell bent on telling every last one of y’all just exactly what you were missing.

Dear everyone, I would like to apologize for not trusting you.

Emma and Dexter are complete opposites. Emma is a middle class, over-educated,  prude while Dexter is a handsome, rich and extremely self-absorbed playboy, but…to both of their surprises one fateful night after their college graduation has now bonded them for life. Friends at the best of times and enemies for the rest, both realize their lives are easier with each other than without, but living very different lives leaves a toll and a string of mishaps both feel reluctant to shove under the rug. Will Emma ever tell Dexter how she feels? Will Dexter’s drinking lead him to an early grave, and will either of them ever realize that expectations are worse than cancer?

I finished this book almost 2 weeks ago, and have since written 3 reviews for it.  The first was less than diplomatic, throwing out phrases like “WTF” and “I want to push Nicholls off of a cliff.” The 2nd was a little better only threatening the life of Emma and Dexter, and the 3rd…well… it was probably the worst seeing as how I wrote a 10 page rant about using British slang in nationally published (and recognized) novels. So please believe me when I say this 4th review comes with great reservations and a very tight grip on my general irritation towards this novel.  That said, let me start with the good (cause it’s the shorter list) the overall concept of this novel was great. Take two characters, let them lead their lives, and then check back in on them every year on the same date. Great right? Sure… until you add in the fact that this goes on for 20 years.  That’s right… we are subjected to the mundane trials of Emma and Dexter’s lives for 20, mind numbing, completely obnoxious, whiny years. But wait kids… that’s not that bad part. The bad part, the part that gets under your skin and makes you want to scream is the fact that the CLIMAX of the book happens around chapter 15. A climax that basically ends the books, so imagine my surprise when I had to keep reading… and reading….and reading.  Now, at this point I could keep rambling; tell you that the characters were less than impressive,  (whiny and boring) and that the language was frustrating (British slang mashed with half formed sentences) but what would be the point.  If you still want to read it after my obvious loathing then there is really nothing else I could say.

My overall take. Save your money, and hope to high heaven the movie version is better.

Happy reading my fellow Kindle-ites and remember: sometime diplomacy is over-rated.

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